The Backstory

Moving to a new place gives you a chance to start over, potentially even reinvent yourself if you so choose.  And it all starts with how you present yourself when you meet new people.  Lately I've been thinking a lot about my "backstory"- what I tell people when they ask about what I do, where I'm from etc.  I noticed a while ago back in Chicago that I tend to alter my story based on where I am, who I am meeting, or how long of a conversation I wish to be in.  Now when I say alter, I don't mean lie.  I never say anything that isn't the truth, I just tend to leave things out or frame things in a way that fits the conversation I wish to have.  For example:

Question:
Where are you from?

Potential answers: 
1. I grew up in Iowa.
2. I went to school in Colorado
3. I just moved here from Chicago

All of these are true- but they all lead to very different conversations.  Unless specifically pressed, I tend to shy away from telling people I grew up in Iowa.  This isn't to say I'm not proud of Iowa, I just tend to find the conversations that follow to be... well... annoying.

Answer #1:
I grew up in Iowa.

Sample Responses:
1. Wow, I've never met a farmer!
2. You must really like potatoes!  (Yep, I've had people think it's IDAHO)
3. I don't even know where that is...
4. Heh heh, ever go cow tipping?
5. My [insert random relative] is from Iowa!  Do you know them?



Out here, I've typically been sticking with answer #3- I just moved here from Chicago.  It leads to a lot of conversations about weather and public transportation but keeps me from being viewed as a cultural anomaly who's best friend may or may not have been a prize winning pot-belly pig.  Actually, since I've been trying to have more substantial conversations to actually meet and get to know people, I will usually get through all three answers which can potentially lead to the ever frustrating response:

Oh, so this is your first time living outside the Midwest.- cue all the people of Colorado simultaneously having heart attacks.

Another popular topic when chatting with new people is what you do for work.  This is a topic I especially enjoy because so many people I've met have such interesting jobs!  From working in Hollywood to various artistic jobs it's really cool to hear about what people do for a living.  Of course when it's my turn, there are a few different ways I can take the conversation.

Question:
What do you do?

Potential Answers:
1. I work at the VA
2. I'm in genetics
3. I am a genetic counselor


This topic can get really tricky depending on how I have gauged a persons interest in me or their social aptitude in general.  I will usually only throw out answer #1 when I feel like the question has been asked as a courtesy and the person doesn't really care too much about the response.  If I am correct they will say "cool" and move on, probably assuming that I am a nurse.  If I am wrong, they will inquire more and I'll explain more; no harm, no foul.  Once a person thanked me for my service to our country... that was weird...as I am not, in fact, a veteran...

Now for the difference between answering genetics or genetic counseling.  This mostly depends on how much talking and explaining I feel like doing.  Not many people have a good handle on what genetic counseling is so I never throw it out there unless I'm ready to explain my job.  I also must be fully prepared to answer in-depth ethical questions and clarify that I do not design babies.

I've noticed that out here in LA, I've mostly been responding with genetic counseling.  I've developed a relatively short explanation for what it is and am actually having fun getting into conversations with people about my job, their job, things to do in Los Angeles, etc.  And again, actually getting into a full on conversation generally leads to my full backstory coming out anyway.  I suppose it's a good thing- if I want real friends they are gonna have to like the whole package- Midwest roots and science nerdiness included.

And I have to be able to talk to them without wanting to punch them in the face, so really it's a good test any way you look at. (Kidding! ...kinda...)