The Elephant in the Room...

So there is one VERY obvious difference between LA and the Midwest that I have avoided talking about for quite some time now. Not because it doesn't come into play in my life nearly everyday, but simply because acknowledging it, especially so publicly, makes it real. And having this become real puts me at risk for being uncomfortable and possibly feeling bad about myself. However, the point of this blog is to be open, honest, and push myself; embracing change and new experiences. So, in that spirit, it's time for me to admit that when I go almost anywhere in LA, I become the elephant in the room.  Like, literally the largest person in a sea of toothpicks.

**DISCLAIMER: I do not think I'm fat.  You may think I'm fat, and that's fine, you are entitled to your opinion. I am also not writing this for sympathy or reassurance.  I am not fishing for complements.  I'm trying to broach a topic that plagues FAR TOO MANY women today with some honesty and humor. Hopefully it will at least make someone smile; at best I would love to help someone feel like they aren't so alone when they are sitting on a bench outside of a store that makes seemingly child-sized clothes, waiting for their friends.  Also, for those of you that have never met me in person, I am 6 feet tall. End scene.

Ahem, back to my original point. Seriously.  I'm not kidding. Most days it feels like this:

 Buuuttt some days it feels like this:

I'm swear I'm not exaggerating either. I have never bumped into so many things with my ass when just trying to walk through a place; tables, clothes racks, bar stools, the occasional person in yoga class... it is pretty obvious that the businesses of this city are not planning for people of my stature and girth as their clientele.

Mental gymnastics.

I've been struggling with yoga lately. It's definitely my preferred workout of choice, but I'm just not getting out of it what I used to.  I was initially so drawn to yoga because I felt like it did a lot for both my mental and physical health, but recently, going to yoga has seemed like more of an obligation and has felt more stressful to me than relaxing. Probably because I have been so crazy busy this fall... but despite that, I have been trying to sprinkle in some other ways to maintain both my mental and physical health. Here is a look at how I have been trying to keep a balance over the last few months and find time to enjoy the fall (which apparently means random 90 degree days in November here...).

MENTAL HEALTH: Pumpkin Mac and Cheese
As we speak, I am sitting on the couch drinking a glass of wine. And I skipped yoga today. It was rainy, chilly, and I was in a bad mood. The traffic getting to yoga and parking would have been terrible and I wanted nothing more than to feel cozy and cook some comfort food. Shocking I know, that cooking and eating mac and cheese relaxes me. But I needed it tonight. There is just something about dancing around your kitchen, listening to music, and making-up an ingenious culinary creation.  That's right, totally made this up and I am super proud of it.  (The recipe is at the bottom of the blog post for those who are interested.) Then of course, putting on fuzzy socks and eating a bowl of the stuff is pretty divine too.

PHYSICAL HEALTH: Heroes of Hope 5K
As many of you probably know from Facebook, I ran a 5k last Sunday with some girls from my sorority Alumni group to benefit brain tumor research. It was a great day to run on the beach, a bit warm, but really beautiful. This was actually quite a big accomplishment for me. Since breaking my ankle 4 years ago and getting hardware to repair it, I have really struggled to run like I used to. I have had a lot of problems with leg pain and sciatica and have been really frustrated and annoyed with myself and my body.  It was really great to balance running with yoga to train for this and I really focused on not pushing myself too hard, too fast (my main problem post-new ankle). I'm proud to say that I ran the entire 5k in 29:16. My goal was to run it in 30 minutes, so I was spot on. The best part is that I feel great and more pain free than I have felt after running in a really long time.  And all of my wonder friends and family almost doubled my fundraising goal for the race. THANK YOU to everyone that donated.  It means so much to me and of course to those who will benefit from the research that is being funded at all the major hospitals in the LA area.

This adolescent bear is quite proud of me.

LA and I make amends...

So, after getting in a bit of a fight with Los Angeles, I spent sometime getting back to one of the things that made me excited about this city in the first place, nature. Being active and outside has always been somewhat of a reset button for me and a reset was definitely necessary these past few weeks.  I've been traveling a lot lately and I haven't had much time to relax. Any time that I have had in LA has been short and spent trying to cram in friends and events.  Without time to recharge, it's easy to get frustrated. Fortunately, between all of my trips and traveling, I was able to spend some time with nature.

A few weeks ago, my friend Carrie invited me to join a girl she knows from college and her friends to go hiking in Malibu. I've been hiking in Malibu many times, but I had never heard of these so called "moon pools" that we were going to see.  After a bit of a slow start, we made our way up PCH and up into Malibu Creek State Park.

Aside from being an absolutely gorgeous place to spend the day, the park has also been used to film many movies and tv shows, as part of it used to be owned by 20th Century Fox. One of the most well known things to be filmed in the park is the tv show M*A*S*H, and you can actually do a hike to the filming site.

M*A*S*H Site hike from Feb 2012